One of These Things ...

After being alerted (via Auto-Fun) to the Maureen Dowd article on Tina Fey, I've got a bone to pick. It's not even specifically with Dowd -- she was quoting Michael Specter, and I feel like the sentiment has been proffered elsewhere -- but calling her "the sex symbol for every man who reads without moving his lips" is ridiculous.

I read, often, and mostly without moving my lips (most recently: Wonder Boys). And if I had to pick a sex symbol, which I'm pretty sure means "symbol of sex" i.e. "the woman I'd most like to have sex with, because seeing her makes me think of sex" it'd be someone like Jessica Alba or Beyonce or Anna Kournikova or Halle Berry, who would make other males' jaws drop when I casually tossed off a "been there, done that" and revealed the ever-so-artistic cameraphone shot of her lying tastefully wrapped in my rumpled bedsheets. Because -- chances are -- they haven't banged a hotter broad.

And even if they had, I'd still get the knowing nod of approval.

(Also, women would seethe out loud, decrying her hotness, all the while wondering what exactly it was about me sealed the deal. So it's win-win ... for me.)

Mrs. Fey, however, is the kind of woman I'd love to spend a quantity of time with because the potential exists that she's smarter than me (possibly), more talented (probably) and also funnier (without a doubt). And on top of those factors, she happens to be pretty damn attractive in the face. And body. That, my friends, is a lady you wife up. Which what's-his-face beat us all too long ago. (That's one for the Visionary Thinking Hall of Fame, ha.)

But remove the "she's Tina Fey" factor, and on looks alone, she falls back to the pack -- the high end of it, perhaps -- but she's not a double-take for every dude out there.

There's a whole world of difference between "interesting, pretty damn attractive female you should marry" and "sex symbol." Because if Tina Fey was in a lineup with the other four girls I mentioned, we'd be guesting on Sesame Street. Sing it with me now:

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