A spirited game of quarters gives way to some card game I'm not remembering, but by the final round involved socials every time anyone had to drink for any reason. I was so tanked at one point, I got up to get a tissue, someone asked me a question, I answered, forgot why I had gotten up and just stood in place, completely lost, for about 45 seconds until someone asked me why the hell I was standing in the middle of the kitchen. Good times.
Now The Groom, Cousin No. 2, had retreated relatively early to the spare bedroom to pass out. Notably, the door between the bedroom and the main room had no doorknob. This is important because the spare bedroom also opened into the bathroom, which then opened into the main room. So to use the bathroom privately, one had to lock both doors, as you can see in this nifty diagram:
Situation finally under control, some brilliant mind (definitely not me; I wouldn't do anything like this twice ...) then decided to leave locked the door between the bathroom and the spare bedroom, which meant when The Groom woke up at 8 a.m. for final prep, he was locked in. Luckily, The Loveseat was up, heard him knock on the door, and allowed the wedding to proceed as planned.
The wedding itself was short and sweet, notable mostly for me cracking up my parents by giving a fist pump when the reading came from the Books of the Hebrews, and also when my mother burst out laughing at bridesmaid Big Boobs McGee, snarkily commenting that she could've left the Wonderbra at home today. The party didn't really pick up steam for a while, and by the time I finally had the chance to open on BB McGee, and did, one of the groomsmen's parents sucked me into a 45-minute conversation. It was good convo, but totally wiped out el chances. Weak sauce.
The party then moved on to one of Holton's two bars, The Jolly Troll, which had a crowd of 20-somethings (the wedding party) and 40-somethings (Townies). Before we left for the Troll, The Best Man gives us his business card, with explicit instructions to call the cell number, because the other number is his parents' house line. (Foreshadowing is GREAT.) So we play some pool, drink more beer, get hit on by some former way-too-old students of our aunt, mother of The Groom, drink more beer, and The Loveseat, finally in the mood, showcases his outstanding ability to start dancing with girls he hasn't exchanged a word with. I'm totally not jealous. Nothing like that at all.
As things begin to wind down, I whip out the old card, dial up The Best Man and ask his wife to come get us. Except by The Best Man, I mean his parents' house, and by his wife, I mean my aunt. And of course, by the time she gets there, we've already gotten a ride and left. Also, because this is Holton, practically everyone there had her as a teacher in high school, so everyone's kind of impressed she's out at the bar. One dude comes up to her, completely soused, and goes, "There was a time in my life when I really didn't like you, but you know what, Mrs. S? You're okay."
And thus ends the story of my sojourn to the flat land of cows and corn. Props to The People's Champ for bookending the trip with rides, and introducing me to Andrea Gibson. I so didn't cry listening to "Photograph." I'm not that guy. Really. Not him. Not me.







4 saw something, said something:
“O segredo do êxito é a honestidade. Se puderes evitá-la, consegues lá chegar.”
Groucho Marx
Sounds like an exciting time! I've never been to a wedding that exciting. I suppose mainly because my family is really religeous so they wouldn't even have anything close to that exciting.
& all my friends that are getting married these days just have something small or elope.
Somehow, though I think pre- wedding partying is more fun for the guys. I could be wrong, though. -shrugs-
Quarters is the only drinking game I play. I've played it a grand total of 3 times. I've won every time, too. :D
I used to love to drink with family. The awkwardness just makes the buzz that much better.
45 minute conversations are torture.
Kanoff - Groucho in Portugese ... Intriguing. The Jew in me approves.
Gen - Yeah, I suppose it was pretty exciting. Since this Groom's brother got married in February, I actually have had two pretty awesome experiences in a row. Here's to hoping they keep up. And pre-partying has to be better for the guys - we can look like crap but throw on a fitted suit and instantly appear snazzy.
That was the first time I'd ever played quarters. Lotta card games and beirut though.
mm - Drinking with family is definitely a nice, awkward buzz. Definite moment of clarity when I realized all they did at gatherings was get tipsy/loaded.
As for the convo, the crazy part was that EVERYONE noticed. People were asking me about that all night. This life.
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